Charter Day weekend is a time for many for reminiscing about the past, seeing people who we haven’t seen in a long time and saying, “Do you remember when….?” Even if you didn’t go to the Academy of the New Church Secondary Schools or Bryn Athyn College, the fall (with its back-to-school feeling) can be a time for thinking back on other times in your life when the leaves were changing colors and the evenings are getting cooler. Often, however, remembering is not a purely pleasant experience. We may remember some things with delight and a smile; but other memories come with an ache, or a sharp pain, or a sigh and a shake of the head.
The teachings of the New Church reveal what may be going on when certain memories are brought to our minds.
There are evil spirits who… draw out of a person’s memory whatever they have thought and carried out since early childhood. Evil spirits can do this so cleverly and wickedly as to defy description. But the angels who are with the person draw out their goods and truths, and in this way defend them. This conflict is what the person feels and perceives in themselves, and is what causes the sting and torment of conscience. …. When a person’s temptation involves those of the understanding, evil spirits activate only the evil deeds they have carried out…. And with these they accuse and condemn. They even activate a person’s good deeds as well…; but these they corrupt in a thousand ways. …. This kind of temptation… is perceived only through the recollection of such experiences, and a kind of mental anguish resulting from this. (Arcana Coelestia 751)
I find passages like this (even though it mentions torment and anguish) hopeful. If you find reminiscing challenging, you’re not alone — it’s not just you. If you found parts of Charter Day weekend hard, there’s a larger context to keep in mind. And most broadly what I take from passages like these is a reminder that here, in this present moment, the Lord is present and working. There is very likely work that we need to do, to process things that happened in the past, to hold on to what’s good and true, and to turn away from what’s evil and false. Our merciful Lord and His angels are here with us to help our memories of the past not just weigh us down and cause us pain but rather be something from which we can gain understanding and strength to find a good way forward.
Do not remember the sins of my youth, nor my transgressions; According to Your mercy remember me, Because of Your goodness, Jehovah. Good and upright is Jehovah; Therefore, He will instruct sinners in the way. He will make the meek to tread in judgment, And the meek He teaches His way. (Psalm 25:7-9)